selah, selah.


I have one of those best friends who peruses and filters the roommate-search postings and boards on Craigslist. Yep, Craigslist.

After intensive scrutiny, she sends along the solid possibilities, with a few creepy ones in between just for kicks and giggles. Take, for example, a “Bob” who is a 50-something looking to share his 200 square foot flat in Denver. Um, for real?

Riding high on the internal empowerment of “finding my own place” or “building a life” or whatever pre-constructed myth I had put in my head, rent price points of $1065, $1280, and even $1300 (for a studio!) initially didn’t phase me. We’ll make this work.

Well. Then I put pen to paper and turns out, life is expensive.

Rent, utilities, car insurance, phone bill, loans, savings, tithing, emergency, fun, gas, food, car repair, clothes, restaurants….?

My euphoria came crashing down – and fast – how in the world do people make this work?

Suddenly my budgeting skills back from the Peace Corps days doesn’t seem so accomplished – yes, I had about $200 to play with, but I simply had to pay for food, transport, and extra expenses as I deemed necessary. My school paid my rent. I was provided with insurance. Oh, and food would cost me something like, 3 or 4 dollars per week. So, you know.

Enter for roommate requests and quickly monthly rent drops around four or five hundred dollars. Now we’re talking. Surely, I had dreamed first and foremost of actually BUYING a piece of property. But, in order to do that, you have to prequalify and when you live in Africa with no credit for a deal of time, you’re not really considered that strong of a buyer.

Bah, ADULTHOOD IS EASY – said no one.

With Rachel’s screening, she helped eliminate or at least remove as much of the “creep” factor as you really can from looking online. I made some calls and wrote back to snarky ads in which one person even posted a Star Wars photo and said it was him and his house-mates. Not missing a beat, I wrote back, introduced myself and said that, “we’d probably make a great fit because I have always found Chewbaca insanely attractive.” And get this, they did write back and are interested in meeting to see if we jive. Hmm. Interesting. Strange, yes, but also very interesting.

So, I’ve started this hunt for where to live and I’ll go through some, I don’t know, “roomie blind dates” to see if there is anyone that I click with. This reminds me of my days, and let’s just pray it doesn’t turn out so ghastly.

It’s the sign of the times: this is not the process our grandmothers or grandfathers would go through to try and find someone to live with. But, the world is a very different place nowadays. Be cautious, don’t be stupid, and with enough luck, it might actually work.

I can think of at least 3 close friends who found lasting roommates this way, so it is absolutely worth a try.


As I try to not scare people away with my extreme extroversion and affinity for books and journaling, I’m committed to laying down PLANS that I create and letting the Lord actually lead this thing – and my life too. I’ve been on a full-throttle, month-long immersion process and to no surprise, I woke up the other morning (yesterday) and realized that quite quickly, I was planning my life like a math equation.

A > B > C ….

And cutting out God entirely.

Operating from the standards of the world, I am buried deep in following what makes sense on a practical, worldly scale.


A Hebrew word that first encountered in the book of Habbakuk to mean, essentially, “wait in peace.” It is also seen as a way to signal a musical interlude; but often the concept is interpreted as taking a moment of silence and digesting what is happening. Kind of how we should strive to be living our lives; instead of this all-hands-on-deck-take-no-prisoners restlessness. You know what I’m talking about?

I’m looking for a roommate, a home, and who knows what else?

Maybe a dog too.

I’m coaching, finding a church home, and joining a small group, anxious as ever to avoid any brush of loneliness.

It’s a lot and with all of this transition, it’s important to let me let God, to feel the transition (because moving on your own is a BIG one), and to feel guided – literally, emotionally, and spiritually.

Convicted, I die to my plans.

For school, for 5 year expectations, and for what society tells us we should or should not do.

We have to rid ourselves of this sickness every day – at least I do – and I suppose the big-time benefit is trusting and KNOWING that God provides. Even if he does so unconventionally, like on


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Heather Newell Oglesby

Hi! I'm Heather. I am a writer and counselor in-training. I share stories so we can keep the magic of being human alive. I spend a great deal of time going on long walks with my wife, rollerblading, learning, and traveling to find new adventures. By day, I work as an Education and Employment Specialist for Jefferson Center for Mental Health, working with adolescents who have experienced their first episode of psychosis. A Colorado native, I love dark-roasted coffee, sunshine, and succulents. Enthusiasm, passion, and possibility: that's me at my best.

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